So… Birth Control Makes You Attracted To Feminine Men

Screen Shot 2014-08-04 at 12.55.38 PM(New post for Lady Clever🙂

I’VE BEEN ON and off (mostly on) birth control pills since I was 18. Preventing unwanted pregnancy, although important, was not the main reason I started taking them. I had cramps that felt like the baby alien from Species was trying to crawl out of my stomach.… Read more

Fellas: Stop Calling Women Crazy

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I’ve heard “we broke up because she was psycho” exactly one million times. Was she? Did she have multiple personalities and try to kill you? Did she create a fake Facebook account and flirt with you to test your loyalty, and when you agreed to meet up with the fake flirt, she showed up with your dead cat on her head that she made into a Davy Crockett hat?… Read more

Real Men Don’t Exist, Well, At Least Not In LA…

New post for Lady Clever:

REMEMBER that scene from Adventures in Babysitting where the gang had to pick up their car at Dawson’s garage?  I don’t know if it’s possible to be in love at 5-years-old, but I would’ve packed up my Care Bears and days-of-the-week underwear and moved to the windy city for Dawson. … Read more

Dear Bangs, I’m Breaking Up With You

My latest post for xoJane.com:

Dear Bangs,

I’m sorry, but I don’t think I can be with you anymore. I’ve tried different ways to make it work for us, but I honestly don’t know if we’re the perfect fit. I tried blow-drying you different ways, using different brushes and flat irons, but nothing has worked consistently.

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You are NOT selling your arms, you are selling the clothes!

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I should probably be in LA right now going on commercial auditions and working on writing submissions for those shows that seem like they’ll never hire me, but I’m in New York. My bank account needs me to be here. It’s lovely as shit today.… Read more

It’s Really F***ing Hot in NYC

More castings, more waiting.
More castings, more waiting.
I switched birth control pills a few weeks ago to a brand that my insurance covers because I’m sick of paying $100 a month to not have children.  I already get super emotional the week I’m off the pills, but switching to different ones made me extra super woman-y. … Read more

Your portfolio is tacky and your skin sucks.

60's shoot last week in London
60’s shoot last week in London

I woke up this morning- EARLY this morning at 4am because my shit fuck head of a neighbor was up doing drugs and playing the drums.  I called the police. Which is funny because the police were here two days ago to arrest Mark for threating a girl who lives in the building next to us. … Read more

I’m in London and I love it

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http://www.vice.com/en_uk/read/hey-everyone-im-in-london

I’ve been in England for a week – most of which I’ve unfortunately spent drenched in my own jetlag sweats, vomiting expired hazelnut yoghurt into bidets. Other than that blip, and the fact that the combination of bidets and poor nail maintenance is something that the people on the mainland seem overly happy to bear, I love Europe.… Read more

I found myself on one of those “thinspo” sites

http://www.vice.com/en_uk/read/am-i-going-to-be-remembered-by-my-dress-size

If you’ve been a legit model for more than five minutes, you’ll know that being cold and crying takes up an extraordinarily large amount of your time. I’ve got a casting in Tribeca today, and on the way to the subway I just burst into tears.… Read more

I was so close to booking a pregnancy test commercial in Prague.

http://www.vice.com/en_uk/read/im-pregnant-and-im-going-to-prague

Last week I had an audition for a pregnancy test commercial. Initially I was about as thrilled as I would have been had I found out that another human being was swimming around in all the beer and anxiety in my gut.… Read more